The Wish I Wish I Never Wished

As I promised in my last post I would love to tell you about a miracle that happened to me.
Many miracles have happened in my life, some happened for good and some happened for bad(probably to teach me a lesson). I see miracles as something that don't have any logical explanation. I would like to keep the good miracles that have relevance today in my life and the bad miracles in the closet. I would tell you about some good miracles when my wishes get fulfilled (I had a deal with God, He is granting me wishes on installment basis).

The miracle I would like to share with you has no relevance as of now in my life. Before I tell my story I would wish that my dad never reads my blog. So my friends who know my dad, I request you not to mention about my blog to my dad. Here goes my story.....

My half yearly exams had ended a day or two before Diwali. I had screwed my papers, well screwed in the sense I knew I would score below par the standards set by my dad and I had earlier promised dad that I would top the class this time(I was a good student at that time). I was worried about the parent teacher meeting that was scheduled on next Saturday. My class teacher who was also my chemistry teacher and the person I ever hated most in my life would surely feast on my low performance and spin his tales about me that would make my dad very angry and my dad had promised he would kick me out of the house if I did not perform. I was thinking of all possible escape routes and ways to appease my dad. It seemed as if all doors were closed and I had to face my dad's anger(I was worried about his blood pressure too).

On Diwali night, I was studying and it was past midnight. All the sounds of crackers died down and cool wind was blowing outside. I went outside to inhale some cool air and give my worries some rest but deep down I was wishing Oh!God save me, do something, inflict me with some fever or disease, atleast that would appease my dad, do something that would turn his anger into sympathy. The leaves rustled with the wind and it very much sounded like "Aaasss Youuuuu Wishshshhhh".

Wishing thus, I went inside and closed my books as I prepared to sleep. I tried to switch off the light with my left arm, but my hand would not rise. I switched off the light with my right hand and went to sleep, thinking my left hand had gone numb due to cold.

Next morning, I woke up but my left hand was still numb. I thought it needed some sunshine to get back to life. I got ready for school and rode on my bicycle. Early morning school rush required that I put a brake on my cycle every now and then and to my own disappointment I could not apply the regular left brake and every time I had to apply the right brake which stopped with a jerk. Somehow I reached my school safe and sound and returned back home. But my left hand was like dead rubber, no pain, no movement, no stimulus. I laughingly showed my hand to my mom, yes I was laughing as I could not understand what happened to my hand and strangely I did not feel any pain or anything. I could not lift a glass of water. My mom told me not to play stupid jokes and asked me to behave normally. I just could not stop laughing. My brother was saying "you are a very good actor , you may give some tough competition to bollywood biggies".

Till evening before dad came back home, I tried all sort of treatments. I gave shock, poured boiling water and did all sort of cannibal things. Even if I had cut my fingers, I wouldn't have felt an ounce of pain.

When dad came back home, he was quick to notice my condition and asked me to do some exercises. When nothing worked we decided to go to the doctor next day.

Doctor examined me and said he could not understand how I got this condition. He suggested this happens with heavy drinkers or who are on drugs. Alcohol that too at school time, even now I don't go to places even if I get a whiff of alcohol.It has got nothing to do with my religious beliefs, I just loathe that smell.

Doctor warned me not to put any stress on the hand and I could not control my smile when I remembered what I had done the other day.He added that any stress could lead to paralysis of my entire left side.He prescribed me some medicines, an x-ray scan and then a MRI scan. Neither X-ray nor MRI scan showed any abnormality. They suggested everything to be normal.Finally doctor said "I don't know what's wrong but I would give you some medicines, lets see if they work."

I did not go to school till parent teacher meeting and sent a leave letter through my friend. After winning all the sympathy of my dad now, I confidently went to parent teacher meeting. My class teacher showed us the report card and first thing that caught my dad's eye was the remark "Very Very Irregular". My dad asked the teacher "Doesn't he come to school, where does he go after leaving from home? He asked for the attendance register. Except for these few days before PTA meeting I hadn't missed even a single class. My dad got furious and scolded the teacher for torturing students with his antics. I was enjoying the scene when my dad and all other parents started scolding the teacher left and right. I was simply delighted to see the person I hated most under attack. On the inside I was like "yeyeyeye". I was also delighted my dad took my side.

Few days after the PTA meeting, my dad said your condition saved your skin this time, better perform next time. I had thought he had forgotten all about the marks.

I must mention here that I was perfectly hale and hearty before the Diwali night. Just that the wish got deadlier and hit me back hard.

Except for this bright period, I had suffered like a limbless person for nearly six months. I looked so helpless without my left hand, I prayed to God every day to make my hand alright. Slowly, my hand started functioning again, thanks to the medicines doctor prescribed. I also thanked God that He did not work my wish on the right hand and had affected only my left hand that too below the wrist. I just see it as miracle by God to teach me a lesson. Now my hand is perfectly alright and I am very much thankful to God that I have perfectly working hands, legs, eyes, ears, nose and I am free of any physical defects.

I have been careful since then not to wish any stupid wish no matter come what may.

God has to be Human.....at some point!!!

Hey, just don't start drawing conclusions. I am not suggesting that God is human and I am very much a believer as you are. I don't know how God looks like, maybe He emits rays of light that couldn't be seen by human eyes or human made devices. God is the creator of all universe and it is He who runs the show.


I was thinking about God when a doubt passed my mind.


Doesn't God ever get bored when everything runs according to His laws and His predefined path? Well, He knows where to find His objects and what will be the next course of action of His object(By object here, I mean His creations). That is how we humans perceive Him to be all powerful and all knowing.


Why this (blasphemous to some of you) thought crossed my mind? I don't want to speak very high philosophy here. I just want to put my views here as guy who loves to play computer games.


Computer games are designed by humans and played by humans. When you start playing single player computer games and move towards the finish, you come to identify all the loopholes, exit paths and shortest paths in the game. When you play the game again you know what to anticipate next. As you play the game again and again you master the game. When you master the game and when there are no challenges left, you eventually get bored and stop playing that game.


Even when you play multiplayer games, its all about reading the minds of other human players. After playing with a set of humans for sometime, you can always predict their moves if you are a good observer.


So I see that all our lives and the forces of nature are just part of God's big game. Since He is the One who created this game, he too must be bored. And when you get bored with all that you have or you can have, you cease to exist.


But again I am not ready to accept that God has ceased to exist as I have witnessed some amazing miracles in my own life(I will tell you about one in my next post).


So, what keeps us from boredom and keeps us engaged is the unpredictability and uncertainity in life. Some keen observers may predict about the environment and people around them but they can never predict what the nature has in store for them.


Try putting yourself in God's place. Assume you have all His powers, you could read the minds of fellow humans and manipulate them as you wish. You can make people work for you with your powers and and make people like you and love you but not because of their natural instinct to love you but because you are manipulating them to love you. It is as good as making a robot work for you or assume a doll that is sitting next to you is loving you. Would you love such life, such mechanical life? When everything gets so predictable, life becomes monotonous and its difficult to find purpose in that life.


So it is the unpredictability that makes human life spicier.


I believe even God has an element(It can be very minute) of unpredictability affecting Him. He too has to be uncertain at some level that drives Him to evolve and continue to exist. Maybe for the uncertainity factor He plays dice(a multifaced dice ---> I know how to cheat with a 6 faced dice) or does some random function. This randomness makes God human at some point, at some level(at a very minute level).

I am an ENGINEER!!!

A pastor, a doctor and an engineer wait for a particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumes, "What's with these guys? We've been waiting for 15 minutes!"
The pastor says, "Hey, here comes the groundskeeper. Let's have a word with him."
"Say, George, what's with that group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?" the doctor asks.
The groundskeeper tells them that the other golfers are a group of blind firefighters who lost their sight saving the clubhouse from a fire and that they come and play for free whenever they want.
The group is silent for a moment.
The pastor says, "That's so sad. I will say a special prayer for them tonight."
The doctor says, "Good idea. I'm going to contact my ophthalmologist buddy and see if there's anything he can do for them."
The engineer says, "Why can't these guys play at night?"

The Two Warriors

The two warriors faced each other in the battlefield.

Few years backs it was hard to imagine that these two warriors who were once inseperable could be facing each other in a battlefield. They had grown up together and were taught by the same master.

Each one was equally skillful and adept in using all the weapons known to mankind.They had learnt every art form of war and battle strategy. These two being exceptionally gifted were unrivalled in all known methods of fighting and warfare. But what endeared them to all was their humility and compassion for their fellow humans.

The two were quite close to each other and as a team had won many tournaments in their school. The beautiful thing in their friendship was that both respected each other for one's skills like true masters. As they completed their education, their master sent them in different directions to try their luck in the world as soldiers ,that is what he trained them for. The two bade their master and each other a tearful farewell and went on their way.

They enrolled themselves in city tournaments and won tournaments after tournaments as they move fron city to city. Both had taken the same path only that their directions were different. Soon they caught attention of their respective kings and were inducted into kings' army. They fought and won many battles for their kings and soon became generals. Overawed by their prowess, many enemies submitted themselves to them, some safely befriended them. Their own kings treated them like kings. Soon the known Earth was divided into two big empires.

History would have been beautiful had the two empires ignored each other, if could not shake hands. But damn the human nature, each empire wanted to prove its superiority. Both the emperors called upon their vassal kings and ministers and decided to go to war. Now our poor warriors bound by their loyalty to their kings readied themselves for the battle.

As the two armies stood face to face, it was a magnificient sight to see such a large crowd dressed in shining armours and carrying their shining lances and waiting to slaughter each other. The two warriors had seen enough bloodshed in their life as they conquered kingdoms after kingdoms. So they spoke to their kings and it was agreed to fight each one's best soldier and the losing side would submit itself to the other. As a result, the two friends faced each other,with tears in their eyes and a great urge to embrace each other.

With heavy hearts they picked their swords and shields. Once they started fighting there was no place for human emotions, they had completely transformed into warrior modes. Both armies stood watching them fight and could not stop praising them for their moves, the attacks and the defenses were worth an ode. The fight went on and on and none of them showed a sign of fatigue. It seemed their fight would never end and no result was in sight. Then suddenly a sword struck one of the warrior's head and he fell down dead. A moment's hesitation did him in.

This was the moment everyone waited for and the winning warrior's army broke the agreement and attacked the opposing army viciously. Demoralised by their hero's fall, they could not offer any resistance and simply fell like pack of cards.

Now the Earth was ruled by a single empire. Historians deified the winner, attributed him with superhuman and godly virtues that were not his. They simply made him look like God for the generations to come. But a hero has no value if he doesn't have a formidable foe. The warrior who died defending his country was villified, and basest of vices were painted on his character convincingly. He was made to look like a monster for the future generations to loathe him. The bloody power struggle was described as triumph of good over evil.

That's how victors and winners doctor and manipulate history.

The Thinking Bird

Long time ago when our old Earth was covered with green forests unlike the concrete forests today, there lived a hunter and his family. A famine in his village forced him to move his family to another vilage. They travelled through dense forests for many days braving the heat and storms. Hungry and tired they decided to take rest under a great peepal tree one stormy night. Kids were growling with hunger but hunter and his wife could only watch them helplessly and sob silently. The hunter found some dry wood and lit a fire to keep himself and his family warm.

High above on the tree a small bird was watching them while his mate took care of the small fledgelings. The bird imbibed with great moral and ethical values of ancient India, felt pity at their plight. He told his mate "Look dear we have some guests and it is our duty to see that they are not hungry." Then he jumped into the fire offering himself to the hunter's family. The hunter was confounded when he saw the bird jump into fire and thought it to be an accident. Looking at the size of the bird, he prayed silently for few more accidents like that.

Up above on the tree, the she-bird realising that her husband's small body won't suffice their guest's hunger, she bid her young ones goodbye and jumped into the fire. After seeing their parents, how could the fledglings be far behind. They too jumped into the fire.

The hunter oblivious of animal emotions could never realise the greatness of the sacrifice of the bird and its family. He simply thanked the Almighty for the 'accidents' and heartily gobbled up the birds alongwith his family.

Was it hunger or the birds really tasted that good? The hunter and his family were simply delighted and just could not stop praising the God for the tasty food all night. The resourceful hunter woke up early in the morning and caught few more birds and moved to the next city. The birds were a big draw in the city and soon many other hunters forayed into the forest hunting the birds. Within few months, the entire species of the birds was wiped out. As for the hunters they started looking for the new fowls.

Well this was the story of the Thinking Bird. I leave the moral to you.